Home Sweet Home

"Home sweet home
is where the heart is"
is quite a simple phrase
but deeper in meaning it has

A sweet home
is nonetheless, ever so true
a happy establishment
with love and joy so full

This sweet home
beckons and calls at will
when we empty, far apartto return for our fill

Home sweet home
is not necessarily
a place physical in nature
it can be found quite freely

Our sweet home
it is from within found
when our hearts are happy
and our love unbound

_____________________

We once had that sweet home
such a fervent and arduous love
it used to be so peaceful
flying gracefully like a dove

Now that home is empty,
like a palace, broken-down
cold and damp
downtrodden with a sad frown

Within this home
lies our once warm hearts
broken and shattered
thousands of pieces fallen apart

This dark home of ours
used to burn ferocious
now is only left
to pick up the pieces

We may have left our home
for new sort of starts
with whatever pieces
is left that can be found of our hearts

But I don't want a new home
the old one was just fine
true it needs to be fixed
this house can again be sublime

That once sweet home
still stands fortunately upright
though the inhabitants have gone
friendship's foundation has kept it full of might

Alas I will stand by this shabby home
hope can be seen from the den
Some sincere hard work
a small candlelight lingers within

I stand by this home
I will wait ever so patient
for your return
to a home ever so magnificent

My heart beckons you home
to find your way back
to a home sweet home
where our hearts should be.

A Struggle

Why does this always happen to me
Just when I thought I'd escaped
How I'd run and love freely
A sadness envelopes
Holds me down from glee
A joy no more, again
The pain beckons me
The love that I once had
Knifes the back of me
Strikes me down
Breaks my heart unmercifully
She was the one or so I thought
But now she leaves
This struggle I have
Has jaded me
From upon high above
I fall unrestrained and deeply
Into the sorrowful bottomless pit
A love within that still yearns whole-heartedly
Even though there is no reciprocation
A candle still burns in the core of me
Waiting against all hope
For return of arms embracing me
A struggle I live with
Is this attempt futile and naive
Only time will tell
Struggling I am, struggling I will be.

Pain and Torture

Deep within the craters
of my battered heart
lies a truth that hurts
more then lies can ever be.

A once blissful love
has now been turned
upside down
and every which way.

The insults to my heart
are hard to bear
once fluttering like a butterfly
now stings like a bee.

This is lower than
the bottomless pit's depths
pain and torture
falling endlessly.

Never before in my life
have I had to bear
such a pain and torture
with no end in despair.

How could this happen
why did it come to this
could I have changed it
made it better?

Never have I tried so hard
and then given up
fought the good fight
and still be in such sadness.

Usually and normally
when I try my best
and reached my limit
I'd be satisfied.

Somehow this time
things have changed
I'm not satisfied
even though a ceiling is reached.

Maybe its because
I've devoted so much time
invested so much energy
that it hurts to break apart.

However the dirty deed
now has been done
resulting in shattered hearts
of not one but two.

This will handicap me
for the rest of my life;
A love I cannot keep
A love I have destroyed.

Never again it seems
I've reached a limit
love is without a doubt
not for me, the simpleton.

Though I acknowledge this
I can't get past the fact
I cannot accept this idea
or be satisfied with the interpretation.

On other hand
I never want to hurt
another person again
everyone deserves better than me.

Each time the pain
cuts deeper
and the torture
is much stronger.

I must come to the realization
make a profound resolution
that I lack the ability
to love intricately.

Somehow
I still want to try
yearn to push the limit
and make the goal.

But I know within
the resounding result will be
pain and torture
pain and torture.

Therefore I must change
stop the deceiving
that i could love
and make someone love me.

Though it would be nice
to be loved and cared for
but I guess it won't be me
too much pain and torture.

This sadness envelopes me
shrouds me under the blankets
Will I ever get out
Who knows?

This pain and torture
is too much to be
probably what i deserve
pain and torture.

What is love?

What is love?
Full of wonder and awe
Coupled with
Anger and frustration
Can't have one
With out the other
The painful moments
Pepper and seasoning
The joyful ones
Patience and forgiveness
Go hand in hand
With the romance
Otherwise,
Love would be boring
All those good times
Would be meaningless, useless
It is within those desperate times
That make love so tender, so special
I have been through it
I cherish it all
Whether it be bad or good
The package is better
As the sum of all parts
Though I may have failed now
It is with all my heart
That I was able to experience it
Truly, madly, deeply
I go forth now
Truly understanding
It is better to have love lost
Than never to have loved at all
Though this part of my life's journey
Most likely ends here
I go forth to better the lives of others
I've had my time and realize
I'm not as good as a lover
As another can be
But I can better love someone
By being a better friend.

Love is a complex entity. I'm a simpleton, not good for deeper thought and intricacy. I'm saddened by the fact that I cannot do better, but maybe this is God's plan for me. I accept the path if truly indeed this is. God's work for a better world starts here and now. I must be the best I can be to be able to give back to the world what I have received. Maybe this is the love that I am able to grasp and perceive. I will now proceed.